Last Call Review of draft-ietf-v6ops-nat64-experience-09
review-ietf-v6ops-nat64-experience-09-genart-lc-davies-2014-01-30-00

Request Review of draft-ietf-v6ops-nat64-experience
Requested rev. no specific revision (document currently at 10)
Type Last Call Review
Team General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart)
Deadline 2014-01-28
Requested 2014-01-16
Draft last updated 2014-01-30
Completed reviews Genart Last Call review of -09 by Elwyn Davies (diff)
Opsdir Last Call review of -09 by Ron Bonica (diff)
Assignment Reviewer Elwyn Davies
State Completed
Review review-ietf-v6ops-nat64-experience-09-genart-lc-davies-2014-01-30
Reviewed rev. 09 (document currently at 10)
Review result Not Ready
Review completed: 2014-01-30

Review
review-ietf-v6ops-nat64-experience-09-genart-lc-davies-2014-01-30

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on
Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at

<

http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.

Document: draft-ietf-v6ops-nat64-experience-09.txt
Reviewer: Elwyn Davies
Review Date: 28 January 2014
IETF LC End Date: 28 January 2014
IESG Telechat date: (if known) -

Summary:


Not ready.  This document needs a serious rewrite with the assistance of 


a mother tongue English speaker.  I started doing some of this getting 


as far as s3.1.4, however I came to the conclusion that significant 


parts of the language were sufficiently unclear that I was unable to 


determine the intended meaning.  Accordingly I have abandoned the review 


and will have another go assuming a rewrite is done.  Please consider 


whether the title should be modified as noted below.




Major issues:

Minor issues:


Title:  The title is rather misleading since it the document actually 


documents two suggested ways of deploying NAT64 as well as experience of 


deploying these solutions. Maybe 'NAT64 Deployment Options and Experience'.






s1: A reference to explain what PDP context etc means in an LTE 


environment would be useful.






s3.1.3: It is stated that placing the NAT64 (middlebox) in a centralized 


location would 'reduce the diversity of  log format'.  I guess what is 


possibly being said that is that the network should preferentially use 


just one NAT64 box centrally placed rather than several (smaller) boxes 


at various edge locations.  I think this needs to be explained more 


clearly (assuming I have it right).  OTOH I would rather expect that 


most network owners would go for a single species of NAT64 box so the 


diversity of log formats is really a side issue.






s5.2: The problem here is not specifically geo-location - and since we 


normally don't have any mapping between topology and location this seems 


inappropriate - but doing host identification (which is what RFC 6967 is 


about.  Shouldn't this section just be about host identification?




s8, para 2:



We configure ULAs as NAT64 prefixes on a NAT64-CGN.



So.. is this a mandatory requirement or just a possibility?

Nits/editorial comments:

s1, para 1: s/Internet/the Internet/



s1, para 2: s/simplify networks provisioning/simplify the provisioning 


of networks/, s/confers some benefits to/confers some benefits on/, 


s/such mobile/such a mobile/, s/if Long Term/if a Long Term/






s3.1.1: s/can be seen with better transparency features/can offer 


improved transparency to <state who or what is offered the improved 


transparency> /




s3.1.1: Expand A+P abbreviation.

s3.3.1: s/IPv4 shortage/IPv4 address shortage/



ss3.1.2, 3.1.3 and 3.1.4: These are very long paragraphs.  It would be 


good to separate the various discussion points into separate paragraphs.






s3.1.2: "..to enable access of IPv4 only applications" Presumably this 


is access to applications running on the IPv4 side from applications on 


the IPV6 side... Suggest


"to allow applications running on the IPv6 network to interact with 


applications that can only use IPv4 communications or IPv6 applications 


that need to communicate using literal IPv4 addresses."




s3.1.2: s/discover NAT64 prefix/discover the NAT64 prefix/

s3.1.2: need a reference for BIND.



s3.1.2: s/...(BIND) software supports the function./The ... (BIND) 


implementation of NAT64 supports this discovery function./




s3.1.2:s/Operators should not/Users should not/ perhaps.

s3.1.2: s/going to IPv4-only service/going to IPv4-only services/

s3.1.2: s/restrains NAT uses/restrains NAT usage/



s3.1.2: s/all traffic flows have to be traversed and translated./all 


traffic flows have to traverse the NAT44 middlebox and be translated there./






s3.1.2: s/may serve a double roles, i.e. a translator and IPv6 


forwarder./may serve a dual role acting as both translator and IPv6 


forwarder./




s3.1.2: s/Therefore, both IPv6 and IPv6

s3.1.2:
OLD:


In some sense, it encourages IPv6 transmission and restrains NAT uses 


compared to NAT44(if used), on which all traffic flows have to be 


traversed and translated. In some cases, NAT64-CGN may serve double 


roles, i.e. a translator and IPv6 forwarder. In mobile networks, NAT64 


is likely deployed as the default gateway serving for all the IPv6 


traffic. The traffic heading to a dual-stack server is only forwarded on 


the NAT64. Therefore, both IPv6 and IPv4 are suggested to be configured 


on the Internet faced interfaces of NAT64. We tested on Top100 websites 


(referring to [Alexa] statistics). 43% of websites are connected and 


forwarded on the NAT64 since those websites have both AAAA and A 


records. With expansion of IPv6 supports, the translation process on 


NAT64 will likely be faded. In addition, it should be noted the 


DNS64-DNSSEC Interaction[RFC6147] may impact the DNS64 process. For 


example, DNS64 will not work with the case, where there is a DNS query 


with the "DNSSEC OK" (DO) bit set and the "Checking Disabled" (CD) bit 


set received.



NEW:


In some sense, it encourages IPv6 transmission and restrains NAT usage 


compared to system using NAT44 (if used), on which all traffic flows 


have to traverse the NAT44 middlebox and be translated in passing. In 


some cases, NAT64-CGN may serve a dual role as both translator and IPv6 


forwarder. In mobile networks, NAT64 is likely deployed as the default 


gateway serving all the IPv6 traffic. The traffic heading to a 


dual-stack server is only forwarded via the NAT64. Therefore, it is 


suggested [or may be RECOMMENDED] that both IPv6 and IPv4 are configured 


on the Internet facing interfaces of NAT64 middleboxes.  We tested the 


configuration of the Top100 websites (as identified in the [Alexa] 


statistics).  43% of websites are [Should this be "would be"] connected 


and forwarded via NAT64 since those websites have both AAAA and A 


records. With the expansion of IPv6 support, the need for the 


translation process on NAT64 middleboxes will likely diminish. In 


addition, it should be noted that the interaction of DNS64 and DNSSEC 


[RFC6147] may impact the DNS64 process. For example, DNS64 will not work 


in the case where a DNS query is received that has the "DNSSEC OK" (DO) 


bit set and the "Checking Disabled" (CD) bit set.







s3.1.3: s/is problematic from multiple-vendor's equipment due to 


inconsistent formats of log records./obtained from equipment supplied by 


multiple vendors may be problematic due to inconsistent log formats./






s3.1.3: This gave me a bit of a laugh...  So having got over my unstable 


user experience (probably due to excessive consumption of beer..)



OLD:
   Since the topology on each
   path is different, it may cause unstable user experiences and some
   degradation of Quality of Experience (QoE) when fallback to the other
   protocol is not powerful enough.
NEW:


   Since the routes taken by the two traffic sets may be different, 


user experiences



   may be inconsistent and there may be some
   degradation of Quality of Experience (QoE) when fallback to the other


   protocol is not sufficiently rapid. [or does this mean that the 


alternative route



   doesn't have enough capacity]

Please clarify.



[I gave up on language corrections at this point as it essentially needs 


a serious rewrite.]




s4.1, last para: Specifying 91.21% of traffic seems inappropriately exact.



s6.1:  It may well be that NAT64-CGN have an FTP ALG .. given the 


general view that FTP shouldn't be used it seems peculiar that this is 


the only default implementation!


Perhaps a comment about this (and maybe even TURNING OFF the FTP ALG) 


seems like an option.